“IT’S DECORATIVE GOURD SEASON, MOTHERFUCKERS” 15TH ANNIVERSARY BEANIE

$40.00


It’s fall, and you’re feeling festive and tasteful as a pumpkin-spice-torched asshole. For the last fifteen years you’ve shared Colin Nissan’s viral “It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers” to everyone in your social circle and think it makes you so fucking quirky and clever. Now the air is getting brisk, and you need something to go with your flannel shirt and tattered overalls when you take your chummy little shit-for-brain friends apple picking. This hat is for you. Celebrate our goddamned crystal anniversary and get the satisfaction of looking like you just stepped out of a fucking L.L.Bean catalog. Just forty bucks for this luxurious-as-hell beanie while supplies last, so you can declare to the world, “I fucking love fall.”

Get this beanie for just ten fucking bucks when you subscribe here. Looking for more decorative gourd trinkets and shiny fucking doodads? Click here and slop it right up.

For prolonged durability, hand-wash only and avoid fucking ironing.